Running Club

By: Douglas V. Johnson

Congratulations to the participants of the victim impact-related “416-2-911 RUNNING CLUB” program at RNCC. Due to the years-long waiting list for the Victim Impact Program at RNCC, incarcerated military Veterans took the initiative to start a running club in honor of the victims in their cases, their families, and their own families. The running club also doubles as an empathy-building, mentoring/peer-support program.

On 4-16 (2007), there were 32 Virginia Tech students and faculty members killed in a mass shooting. On 9-11 (2001), there were 2,977 people killed in the deadliest terrorist attack on U.S. soil.

In the five months between 16 April and 11 September, the twenty-man Veteran and non-Veteran running club ran a combined total of 2055 laps (222 miles) around their recreation yard. On 9-11, they closed out their run with an Army cadence.

The requirements to be in the running club:
1.) Request to be added to the RNCC Victim Impact Program wait list;
2.) Watch the VADOC Victim Impact video (on JP6 players);
3.) Participate in H.O.P.E. (Helping Ourselves Progress and Evolve) Self-Awareness Program discussions/conversations;
4.) Intend to stay infraction-free, and
5.) Most importantly, to realize that they are running with a purpose.

If we are genuinely striving towards personal growth, it is critical we realize our crimes still have a tremendous ripple effect on others. The greatest service that we can do now, is to not waste the time they are serving in prison.

Although program opportunities and mental health services may be severely limited while we are incarcerated, let us all continue to take the initiative in creating our own opportunities for our personal growth.

DOUGLAS V. JOHNSON, II (#1937011)
RNCC Veterans Support Group
Mentorship Committee Chairman

*RNCC Facility Leader/Lead Mentor/Education Advocate for The Forty STRONG, Brilliance Behind Bars, & TF CXJ III

There has to be a better way…(part I)

I’m doing 10 years in Virginia State Prison, for Involuntary Manslaughter, for the accidental overdose of my late girlfriend Nicole Shifflet. My story needs to be told, hopefully to help prevent another overdose, promote overdose awareness, to educate, and put a spotlight on Virginia’s Good Samaritan/ Overdose Protection Law (18.2-251.03).

On 8-11-2020, my girlfriend Nichole “Nikki” Shifflet wanted to come and stay with me for a couple days at my hotel in Williamsburg. Nikki and I are both addicts and have multiple mental health diagnosis as well. We met each other at an assisted living facility for people with mental health problems. The Monday of the 10th, Nikki starts to make plans to get a ride to me, I was on the chase to get my daily dose of heroin (dope, as I will refer to) with my dealer/friend. We go and get some dope, some crack, and some weed and we are headed back to my hotel. I met Nikki at a 7-11 and paid her friends some cash and weed for bringing her and waiting for me. We went back to my hotel, my dealer/Friend left and went to his room down the hall. We started using the drugs i bought, we had sex, then we went swimming in the pool for a few hours came back and showered together used more drugs then we went and got snacks, and then ordered dinner from the bar. We went back to our room and used some more, got in bed and hooked up again and then went to sleep. Around 12:30 am on 8-12-2020 my dealer/friend came knocking on my door and woke us up, he asked me if I had any dope left from what he sold me earlier, I told him I had a little bit left for the morning. He then said he could not re-up until later the next morning, that he had some more crack we could all smoke if I shared the dope with him and he would give it back once he got more later that day. He came in we all started smoking crack together, I gave him the rest of the dope. He poured some on the table and sniffed a couple lines, and Nikki asked if she could try some, I told her no way, baby you do not even use dope! I told her that this stuff was really strong and how all dope nowadays probably has fentanyl in it. We argued back and forth and the dealer/friend said a lil bit would not hurt anybody, so I gave up arguing and he scraped a little tiny bump and handed her a rolled up bill and she sniffed it, said “thank you baby, I love you” and gave me a kiss then hopped up on the bed next to the table we were all sitting at. She was smoking a cigarette and I prepared to inject ( i was the only IV addict) the rest of the dope while we were all talking and laughing. The next thing I know she was no longer holding my hand and she was not responding. I jumped straight up and started trying to wake her, I told my dealer/friend she was overdosing. I grabbed a Narcan nasal spray and administered it while I started calling 911. The dealer/friend freaked out and said he was not sticking around. He said that I had it under control and not to tell anyone he was there, and he ran away and hid. I was already giving CPR as he left and was telling 911 operator what happened. I never gave up, I never left her, I kept her alive until police and EMT took over, they told me to wait in hallway, I was devastated and could not stop crying and asking if she was going to be okay. I was told over and over again that I did everything right and everything I could, it was now in God’s hands. She never went without oxygen, and she had a breathing machine on her when they took her to the hospital.

The police asked me what happened and I told them she sniffed heroin and fell unconscious they started taking pictures and picking up all the drugs and paraphernalia that was in view( I never attempted to conceal anything, my only concern was for Nikki!!). Unfortunately, Nikki passed away 3 days later from ” Cardiac arrest, caused by acute combined cocaine and fentanyl overdoses, with chronic substance abuses contributing”. I was and still am trying to understand how she didn’t recover, why I was spared? She was an amazing beautiful young lady, a mom of a 6 year old son! Exactly one week has passed, now I am completely out of control and using so much trying to kill myself. I am arrested by Williamsburg Major Crimes Division, for possession of drugs and paraphernalia from the night of Nikki’s overdose. I tell them I will only talk with a lawyer present. I’m released on bond because my lawyer tells me the charges are bogus and can not stick because I 100% qualify for relief from Virginia’s Good Samaritan Law. I go to detox, trying to get help, and go to rehab. But this is the height of the pandemic and there is no bed space available.

I keep trying and trying relapsing hoping I would OD and join Nikki. Eventually, the charges were dropped, because I qualified for 18.2-251.03. I still could not deal with the loss or get the help I needed, so I ran away from everyone I knew and hid at a house in my hometown with no power until I was arrested on 2-16-2021 for probation violation. The same cops arrested me and wanted to know what happened the night of 8-12-2020. I waived my Miranda warning thinking I could tell them the truth because #1.) I was not a drug dealer, #2.) I did everything I could to save her, and #3 the Good Samaritan Law. I was so hig#h at time of my arrest, I was scared, vulnerable, and fell for the bullshit line the cops were telling me!

I originally said that Nikki had her own drugs, my only lie, but then I told them everything that happened every detail over and over again. They said they wanted to make sure there was no foul play that everybody knew what drugs we were using. They asked me who paid for the drugs, I told them I did over and over again. The interview ended when I realized (sobered up!!)

Tyler McMillen(#1502960)

Glouster, VA.

Lunenburg Correctional Center

The Cliff-of-Death

By D.V. JOHNSON, II (#1937011, River North)

Ice Cold gusty wailing winds and ravaging torrential rains of The Storm as I stand on The Cliff-of-Death’s verge… Electrified trials & tribulations converge&merge causing me to sway&swerve, I see glimpses of my demons clawing up from the Notorious bottomless pit below..

Urges to elude these thunderous throes vigorously intensify, but, threats to throw me over are thereby thwarted… My bellowing cries for a Renewal of Perspective cause me to realize that without pain, I’d have no frame of reference for when something truly deserves to be Glorified…

RECALIBRATING so I can Stand Strong on this cliff-of-death, as my Life’s Purpose is continuously enlightened & further refined.

*Inspired by Psalm 57 during Mental Health Awareness Month (May 2024).

CHAINED

BY D.V. JOHNSON, II

***DVJ’s Author Note: This piece, “CHAINED” was inspired by my Demon, alcohol. Although I am over six years sober, it does not mean that the pit of my gut does not yearn to feel that burn. There is still a temptation to escape the mental anguish at times. It’s no secret that any demon on that side of the wall, is also within these walls. The difference is that “out there” we can distance ourselves from being so close to it. And, “out there” there are FAR MORE RESOURCES (counseling/therapy/treatment/programs/support) to help us improve ourselves. Writing allows me to turn my pain into Purpose. Mentoring also helps me maintain the Positive Momentum that I have gained over my “Time.” I also wrote “CHAINED” to let others know that the are not alone in their struggles.

Afflicted, tormented, conflicted, and Viiiiiiii-olently addicted… Sonorously sodden heavy chains draining the life out of me… Tried & fate-defied… Hooked&shook to the core feenin’ for more but terrified to further explore…

Cold night sweats got me grovelin’ & laid-da-Fuk out on this fawnky-ass floor… as my demons claw at the belly’s eternal depths… teetering at the crossroads of what lies in wait… It is crouched in the low-ready, poised to viciously pounce & gore….

12 Steps away from completely handing the reigns of these chains over to Him and walking along a renewed path, fully restored…

Humbly,
D.V. JOHNSON, II

DOUGLAS V. JOHNSON, II (#1937011)
River North Correctional Center
329 Dellbrook Lane
Independence, VA 24348

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Write-A-Prisoner: DOUGLAS JOHNSON (#1937011)
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COMMANDS FOR MORALITY AND ETHICAL LIVING

My name is Travis Sorrells, #1095956. I am incarcerated at Haynesville Correctional Center. I would like to comment on mental health both in prison and in our world today. I see many problems with mental health here in prison, especially around the holidays. I believe a large amount of these mental health problems are exacerbated by the way our society has devalued human life. I also believe this devaluing of human life has led to a drastic decline in ethics and morality that can be seen throughout our world.

To attempt to curb this decline in ethics and morality, I have come up with a set of moral and ethical commands that I believe could be displayed in schools and other public places with little complaint. Below I will list the commands and then provide a defense for them. Please read through them, meditate on them, and share your thoughts on them. I believe they could help to stem the tide of the devaluing of human life and help alleviate some of the mental health problems we see in our world today.

COMMANDS FOR MORALITY AND ETHICAL LIVING

1) Love one another.

2) Do to others what you would want them to do to you.

3) Be kind to each other and forgive one another; do good works.

4) Constantly think about ways to move others to do good and love one another.

5) Honor and obey your parents and guardians.

6) Do not commit murder.

7) Do not engage in sex outside of the bonds of marriage.

8) Do not steal, cheat, or defraud another.

9) Do not lie or deceive others.

10) Do not strongly desire to have anything that belongs to another.

My defense of these commands:

First and foremost, let me stress, and make it abundantly clear, that I am not trying to replace the Ten Commandments. Nor am I trying to change or secularize the Ten Commandments. I have absolutely no authority, power, or desire to do that. I am merely trying to present to society a list of commands, that if obeyed, could lead to a life of good ethical and moral character and decency. Good ethics and morals, of course, being a necessity for any civilized society to thrive, prosper, and exist.

As a Christian, I wholeheartedly agree with promoting the Ten Commandments as found in God’s Holy Word. As an American, I fully support the Constitution of the United States of America. The right to freedom of religion is a staple in our great nation. It is also a staple of the Bible. God gives us a free will and choices. We can choose God or we can reject Him. We can believe God’s Word or we can doubt it. God doesn’t force us to do anything. Therefore, as believers and as a nation, we have no right to force our beliefs upon anyone.

The “Commands For Morality And Ethical Living” are a combination of biblical teachings and six of the Ten Commandments. They have been written in such a way as to be modernized, easily understood, and universally accepted. Christians, without doubt, will notice no mention of God is made. However, they will easily see God behind each command. Non-Christians will likely view the commands simply as a list of moral and ethical principles. Thus making them applicable to persons of all ethnicities, races, genders, and faiths.

Today our world stands at an ethical and moral crossroads. The direction we take largely depends upon our future generations. These generations need a moral compass, an ethical barometer by which they can gauge thoughts, words, and deeds. “Commands For Morality And Ethical Living” can be that gauge. It can be displayed, taught, and recited in any setting, public or private, without fear of easily offending others. Seated within all humans is a knowledge of what is right and wrong. This knowledge leads to our understanding of what is ethical and moral, and what is not. These commands, especially being applied at an early age, can reinforce one’s knowledge of right and wrong and help establish one’s parameters for living a moral, ethical, and decent life. Thus contributing to the drastic betterment of our society, our nation, and our world.

Thanks for reading my post. I hope you like it or at least found it thought provoking. As I said earlier, please take some time to meditate upon these things and share your thoughts on them.

Travis Sorreals

Mental Health, Hopelessness, Depression, and Despair: You Are Not the Sin.

MENTAL HEALTH IS THE TOPIC,
NOW ALLOW ME TO ROCK IT.

Mental Health, Hopelessness, Depression and Despair, you are not the sin,
You are sometimes just misunderstood on your acceptance as a friend.
Mental Health is a friend and guide to help you heal inside,
She’s not evil’s prize come to take you to the other side.
Relax’s and understand Hopelessness is just a distant relative of despair,
Introducing you to hard times, so you can find out who you are.
Depression is no more than an emotion trapped inside of an illusion,
Expressing an array of feelings while searching for a conclusion.
But first things first, allow me to introduce Myself,
My name is “Alexander Cameron,” and of course you are Mental Health,
My vernacular is very sharp and cunning, How about yourself?
Mental Telepathy is how I roll, I think y’all call it Top Shelf!
Well, Mr. Top Shelf, Gun Violence has you labeled as a crisis,
Pay attention my son, its called politicians making sacrifices,
Y’all call it splitting hairs, we call it word splices,
You know, that lip service, that has you and yours on drugs and reaching for vices.
Check it: Japan say Guns on the streets are just simply dumb,
Her deaths through gun violence in 2022 is absolutely none,
Now, America, you know you are just too through,
Death’s through gun violence has you at Four Hundred Fifty Thousands in the year 2022.
America’s relationship with Mental Health knows no truth,
Mental Health, you are expendable and less than an excuse,
At lease there’s a silver lining, you are not responsible for the youth,
Who has their parents turning back the clock, looking for a clue,
To free their kid’s from this paranoid maze of deceit,
That has their minds trapped in what appears to be certain defeat;
Listen Children;
Your problems are yours to confront, but first you must understand,
No life is without problems, they go hand in hand.
Ultimately your problems are yours to face and yours to Solve,
Excuses are for cowards, get yourself Involved.
Some problems are easy peesy and some are very
hard,
but, its only when you try solving them, that you can tell yourself Good Job.
So, America, let us all give Mental Health her due: because;
No one is responsible for your happiness but you and only you.

Submitted By:

Alexander Cameron
# 1172733

Beaumont Correctional Center
3500 Beaumont Road
Beaumont, Virginia 23014

A Solution: Body Cams

“What can we do as incarcerated people to ensure that we put the right people in office who care about our lives”?

Well, first of all, we need to tell all our friends and love ones on the outside to vote this year for candidates who are supporting “Second Chance.” Also, for candidates who are willing to push for a new “MANDATORY” legislative law… requiring that [all] Virginia Department of Corrections (VADOC) officials (Wardens, Majors, Unit Managers, Captains, Lieutenants, and Subordinates) to wear “body cam”, and for it to be kelp on at [all] times when enter acting with inmates. This will ensure there’s no misunderstanding as to what was said between the VADOC officials and inmates. The lack of “body cams” have clearly caused major problems within the VADOC…because most investigations end up “UNFOUNDED, due to lack of evidence. These problems could have been avoided years ago…if “body cams” were issued to every VADOC official. We need candidates who will step up and fight for the rights of incarcerated individuals. Look at the life’s that have been lost in the VADOC due to violence. We need everyone to get out there during voting time and vote for candidates who’s will to serve and protect those who are housed within the VADOC. We need everyone to get on board! Please do this for your love ones…because they need you. The time is now!!!

Secondly, we have to be proactive ourselves, and write to those candidates as well. When writing to such candidates, please be respectful and explain to them your thoughts and concerns.

Thank you,

Curtis L. Floyd, #1036136

“What’s in the Box!?”

A Perspective on Trauma CompartMENTALization v/s Processing While Incarcerated
DOUGLAS V. JOHNSON, II (RNCC, #1937011)

We stare down into the seemingly bottomless & packed “box” suppressed with our demons/issues/insecurities/trauma. Not getting overwhelmed can be a tremendous task in itself… It can definitely lead to some significant procrastination… A fear of stirring up old pain can cause us to put it off until later as we find something sweet to keep us occupied/distracted.

Unpacking this box alone is not recommended because things usually get worse, before they get better… Unfortunately, in incarcerated settings, mental health resources/programs are severely limited/scarce. If we were in society, we could get a dedicated counselor/therapist to help us unpack this box…

Prior to my incarceration, I ran from working on myself for so long, but now I only wish I had a professional to take me through the process of processing it all. I just poured Gin & Jen on the box and lit it on fire, only to wake up the next morning with it weighing heavily upon my chest… I stored that old beat-up&tattered box in the back of the garage. I got tired of seeing that worn-out taped-up box, so I put it in the Fu€#!ng basement, & then the attic.

But, sitting with me in solitary confinement, I was alone with the box for two consecutive years… Emotions intensified to the n’th degree. The first piece of advice I got from my Boss/Colleague/Mentor was “A counselor just helps you understand yourself better and will give you tools to cope with your issues… So now, it will be on you to gain a greater sense of self-awareness which includes acknowledging your pain & demons… Begin to WRITE & Read, and Keep WRITING and Reading!”

Anyhow, the box gets lighter as we take our time to inventory its contents and acknowledge what’s in there… then, one by one we take it apart to process it, and then put each item on the damn shelf as if it were a trophy, somehow turning it into a Positive. Transforming the gruesome pain into Greater Purpose!!!… Then, we decide when to take the next item out of the box…

As I now confidently look my shelf of sculptures in the eye, I feel tremendous clarity of my issues. I have now taken my POWER back from the box. As the box got lighter, I began to understand myself so much better… A fresh perspective and outlook on life.

Something else also happened… My inability to concentrate began to dissipate and my reading comprehension and memory began to improve. I then realized the impact that my unprocessed trauma had on me over the years.

In our incarcerated settings, the lack of mental health services can exacerbate our mental health issues. Many of us turn to self-medicating our issues which worsens our situations. If we really want to honestly address our problems, we HAVE TO take the initiative to educate ourselves, better understand ourselves/issues, utilize any & all available resources, and invest in & cultivate our support systems. We CANNOT stop at “well, there are no mental health services.” If we wait on DOC (regardless of the state) to provide more services without taking personal accountability & initiative, then we are wasting our ‘Time.’

With all of the reading/writing/self-reflection, my communications skills also significantly improved… All of these improvements have led to me making HEALTHIER life-altering decisions and helped ensure I was emotionally available for my Family.

Addressing our suppressed mental health issues requires extremely hard work when we are out there in a free society even with an abundant amount of resources (therapists/counselors, support groups, variety of medication, treatment methods, etc.). While incarcerated, we have to work infinitely harder if we want to grow and build. One advantage that we do have on this side of the wall is, our ‘Time’ to get laser-focused on unpacking that box… With acknowledgement, comes growth…

-DOUGLAS V. JOHNSON, II (RNCC, #1937011)
19JUL23

The Paradox of the Incarcerated Psyche

Husayn Nix #1409604, Halifax Correctional Unit

“Oppression will drive even a wise man mad,” Bible Verse. A common axiom a person doing time hears at some point throughout their bid is that “prison is like the army, you can be all you can be.” This concept is very true! You can choose to be the same person you were when you came in, or you can choose to be a better version of yourself.

Remember that if you don’t care about your own rehabilitation, then no one else will, and that’s a fact! It is imperative that we use our time behind these walls as wisely and productively as possible. Every move we make has to be to the benefit and advantage of our reentry into society. We are always running low on time, but its still never too late.

Unfortunately, the mental wellness of the incarcerated is not taken into consideration by most, not all, state leaders. They should understand the same person that is serving time within an institution, will at some point during that time, become institutionalized. This disregard negates any weight that could be placed on mental wellness & their so-called awareness to public safety.

If we strive to find ways to get involved in the decision making process, we can begin to learn all of the moving parts that constitute the make-up of the very matrix of our political socio-economic construct.

Change is effected through policy, and policy is effectuated by change makers, or those who dare to make a change. We have to stop selling ourselves short, rise to our potential, and claim our net worth.

I came with Love, and I leave in Peace!

In Solidarity,
Husayn

Hear My Voice!

Hear my voice! Hear my voice!

Is there anyone out there? If so please listen to my voice. I was given a 38 year sentence. Is anyone out there that has a heart? Please take a moment and ” Hear my voice .” I have served 23 years of it so far. I did commit a crime and yes deserve to be punished, but not for this long.
There was a question asked if I can identify with the extra stress brought on by the budget amendment for me, my environment, my loved ones and prisoners behind the walls. My answer would be “yes.” Do you hear my voice crying out in the wilderness? We have a Crisis on Mental Health in the world today. Sad to say not just in our Society, but also behind the walls of prison as well. Hear my voice! Some of us can identify and some of us don’t know how to identify with the situation of it because we have been in denial for far too long. Hear my voice!

Before my incarceration I attempted suicide not knowing how to deal with depression. I know 23 years ago in the black communities we kept things like that on a hush-hush. We were taught to be strong and yet stay silent. Looking back almost two and a half decades ago if I would have gotten help – I believe I would not be in prison still, 23 years later.

Do you hear my voice! People that have a mental condition are being locked up for decades at a time not getting the help that they need. It seems as if they just keep you suppressed with medication after medication. What do we do? We take the medicine just to get by. I believe D.O.C. really needs Mental Health programs that would help people deal with their problems head on instead of just coping with it.

Hear my voice! Hear my voice! I’m still holding on as best as I know how. I must say prison can really work on your Psyche. Especially being incarcerated decades after decades not being able to go up for parole or even have a chance to receive Earned Sentence Credit’s which I have earned my rights to receive. Having done all I can to rehabilitate myself by completing mind changing programs offered by D.O.C. as well as getting my G.E.D. in 2013. I have also been charge free for 18 years of 23 years of my incarceration. Do you hear my voice crying out in the wilderness? Is there anyone out there that has a heart will you listen to me, please?

Here at Caroline Correction Unit #2 I have put a Peer Recovery lead group together along with other men. Learning Objectives, such as understanding Mental Health and Addiction and more. Rehabilitating ourselves. Do you hear my voice!? I have learned in my 23 years of incarceration that if you want change, you have to start from within yourself. Men and women behind the walls to ensure that we get the right people in office. We have to educate our loved ones the importance of voting on the States level because it deals with the laws that affect our everyday lives out there and in here. In my closing men and women behind the walls keep your head up change is coming soon. Hear my voice!

Written By Jerry L James

Caroline Correction Unit #2