Tag: andrew suspense

Many Small Particles

First of all thank you guys for giving my thoughts a voice box!! All too often, thoughts and ideas, dreams, and/or aspirations are severed due to the inability of us with them to have an outlet or audience to express them to!!! So thank you!!!

My quote has a small background in that I’ve currently been incarcerated for 27 years straight and counting!! And in 2000, while in longterm segregation at Red Onion State Prison of which I did 3 years 10 months and 17 days straight of “HOLE” time, I was studying Marcus Garvey, (my personal idol) and in his book he said: “We are but small particles, and it takes many small particles to make up a unit, and many more units to make up a WHOLE!!!”

Meaning, we are but parts and pieces that has to be brought together to make up a whole, and even when brought together, we still have to be adhesive enough to actually grow and bond in order for it/us to work!!! We as a people always find ourselves looking at what we don’t have in common and how different we are and we use that as our guides to discredit or to reject others instead of focusing in on what we want to achieve and how our different ideas and methods or approaches can be of a greater benefit!!! We all too often say the same thing but say it different!!! We can be so much more powerful, we can be so much more effective if we allow our differences to be the magnetic force that pulls us together, instead of being the thing that drives us apart!!!

The American Mafia did more with less! They made billions of dollars with far less people, than say for instance these modern day gangs whose numbers are in the 100,000 whilst collectively they don’t have a million dollars!!! The economic freedoms and opportunities that are ever present today literally have paved roads to success should we take the proper steps!!! But with ignorance, unbalanced preconceived notions we trip ourselves up and those that can or are in a position to help aren’t even given a chance when we snatch the rug from under foot “just because” all too often, we let what separates us guide us and when wonder why we can’t progress!!! We are all survivalists, but we can stand a better chance to NOT only survive but succeed in any endeavor should we look to each other and look at each other as supports rather than adversarial pieces that hinder us.

We can be as different as we naturally are but have the same common goals, objectives, methods, etc… without ever having to sacrifice who and what we are! People with shared ideas/dreams have a higher probability to succeed working with others rather than going at it alone!! Fighting for freedom which a lot of guys imprisoned typically do realize pretty quickly that outside of placing oneself in the vicinity of a crime that fighting for freedom with poor representation does NOT hold well!!! So why do we represent ourselves so poorly????

We sit back and allow others (strangers even) to represent US based off of whatever information/lies/disillusionment that we feed them instead of caring enough to educate ourselves to a point where we stand up and fight for ourselves!!! Every day we wake up to is another unique opportunity to do better than the day before, it can be a day to learn more than the day before, but more than anything everyday we wake up we should always challenge ourselves to do more than the day before!!!!

Most people find weakness in working together, or feel weakened by it!!! It sounds crazy but its the raw truth!!!! When I read the quote from Marcus Garvey, I realized that alone I am small and almost insignificant, but put with the rest of Hashems’ (God’s) creation I become significant and relevant which carries over to those around me and to those who share in my plight, to those who share in my pain,I implore you to now share in my effort!!!

Abraham didn’t know that through His progression that He would advance from Abram and Moses asked God, “Why me for I am slow of speech?” Hashem (God) said, “Go!!! I will be your words!!” We are living in our predestined paths all of which God has chosen specifically for us!!! But we must know that the world spins whether we witness it or not and its our egos and self doubt that holds us back and our circumstances derive from OUR thoughts!!!

In order to rise, we must stand!!! Alone we are small and together we are strong it takes us all and if my insecurities make it hard for me to stand up, will you please give me a hand or boost????!!! Your helping hand and your time and your ears are what gives me the confidence to face myself and the inner changes that I need to make to rise above my past and current circumstances to be lifted to a higher place and peace of mind!!!! Let the God in me commune with the God in you!!! That simple truth can break down so many barriers, walls, prejudices, etc!!!

It takes many units to make up a whole, which means it takes us all!

Yours Truly,
Andrew Suspense, B.K.A. Droopy
#1127539
Lawrenceville Correctional Center

Less Than 100 Years from a Desegregated America

by Andrew Suspense


Do I believe it is possible to overcome hundreds of years of slave trade mentality in America in our lifetime?

Obviously, NO!!! Whilst being objective! The Slave Trade mentality took a few cruel ideas that turned in 100’s of years and generations to first build, then to maintain such harsh judgements, treatment, and to reclassify a people because of the color of their skin – that is not unprecedented. But the systematic way that it grew and kept strong is unprecedented, largely because it still exists today! However, most laws as they are written to date are on the one hand antiqued… they were written to White America because when the laws were put on the books, America was still segregated and basic color segregation kept crimes and criminals to pockets of areas which also largely speaking crimes weren’t committed as freely and as prevalent as they are now! The systematic, and subliminal indoctrination of racism that maintained for hundreds of years, won’t be eradicated in a few decades when racism has now evolved and isn’t expressed as openly and as commonly as it once was. We aren’t even 100 years removed from a desegregated America!!!

As far as crimes being addressed — The most severely and most commonly committed crime in Virginia is robbery! Which is the one crime that has the highest conviction rate of any crime. It’s also committed mostly by minorities, and it is sentenced more harshly than any other!!! Here is a hard fact and I DON’T make mention of it as a way to demean or to mean that one crime is better or worse than the other, but the fact that it holds true is worth speaking on! If a guy raped a woman at knife or gun point, he will get less time than if he took a purse or wallet from the same woman at knife or gunpoint. So her being victimized on the severity scale her purse holds more value than her body/womanhood!!!
And the repeat offenders who victimize women are said that they are sick and need help!!! But the guy who took her money or watch is a hardened criminal who needs to be taken out of society for decades, with no help or rehabilitation. No educational opportunities to have a chance at a job or having skill sets to help ensure ones chances at being a productive citizen! And there could be 100 robberies and all 100 of them are committed 100% different, but no matter the crime Virginia doesn’t allow judges to sentence each according to each set of facts! Not to mention the representation that all too often falls below an adequate level!

“The prison system can be used/utilized by creating things like,” Convicted Leadership Academy’s!!! ” Prison is devoid of so many USEFUL things, whist spilling over in abundance with ignorance and stagnation!
But when we convicted felons step up and grab some of our at risk youth, then we, in that failure to act ,are responsible for forfeited futures! Our painful experiences need to be fuel or boost we need to get up and over our self created walls of doubt, and be the courage to step into a better me. WE have to talk to, we have to guide, we have to beg our youths, we have to yell at and out to OUR youths. Prisoners can talk to those who are seemingly headed to. We are the instruments and vehicles for rehabilitation for OUR youths!

It would be something like the girls and boys club but strictly with convicted felons mainly those currently serving.
Mass incarceration isn’t necessarily racially motivated, simply because America was still segregated which would have had tremendous impacts on volumes of crimes and geographically, so the penal statutes weren’t cratered to minorities even though it seems as if it was and is!? Oddly enough. But enough about what isn’t, or what we don’t have. Let’s just be the change and get it done, by getting it or any other idea going!

Andrew Suspense
Lawrenceville Correctional Center